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San Franicsco Chinese New Year parade

December 14th, 2002

And All That
Friday. Sometimes after an operation, I guess, you notice how far you've retreated inside your head. Life loses edge, thoughts become fuzzy forms that float in and out of comprehension. The days shorten to hours, the hours, maybe two or three, you remember, the rest become a river, a dream of hours flowing into nonsense. There's a point here somewhere, sitting here late this evening, writing, but, you know, it's hard to recall, hard to keep a point in mind, let alone find words that are crisp and clean and free of adjectives. On a Friday evening. Here in Oakland.

Saturday. The package from the Gap arrived (one day later than Land's End, but not bad, not bad) and now I have many jockey shorts and I am ready to enter the mid life phase of this leaky dick business. Still sleeping dry, sitting dry and walking wet, but less wet. I've gone from a two pad man to a one pad man and I am approaching a time perhaps when I will have to pay better attention to measure my progress. "Approaching", rather than "entering", we're not there yet. I would hope, whatever the situation, it won't be too weird when I go back to the office, a stack of new baby diapers in my desk, jockey shorts hidden in the filing cabinet, an extra pair of pants in the overhead in case of disaster.

I have an urge to set up a firewall, a proper firewall running on a small Linux computer. Not sure why. I still have a webcam up on a shelf and all the equipment necessary to get it online. Nothing to shoot, particularly, no great earth shaking panoramas, but it's been sitting here since forever and it's time, maybe, to point it out the window. So I ordered Red Hat and a book on Linux firewalls from Amazon and I'll talk to Dell on Monday.

This has degenerated into another "I wanna buy" list. Is that all you ever think about?

Maybe, maybe. Fuzzy thoughts and all that.

 
The photograph was taken at the San Francisco Carnaval Parade.

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