I Have No Idea
Wednesday. To bed last night at a reasonable time, not sure exactly when I got to sleep, it often feels at the time that is was later than I'd like, but I may be confusing the semi-conscious state that starts the sleeping process with “being awake”. Doesn't matter, up with the alarm easily enough, to breakfast and the papers and back, now to start writing this, tune the guitar and run quickly through the lesson before setting out. A guitar lesson Wednesday, next week marking my first ten months of instruction.
I'm further along in these ten months, yes I am, but in some ways I feel as if I've made little or no progress. A bit like that dropping off to sleep perhaps, you don't notice the obvious when you're in the middle of it and tend to think dark thoughts.
Clear, by the way, spotty high white clouds high in the sky, the sun shining through, the day is going to be hot. What I call hot, what the rest of the world calls really good weather with temperatures that don't drive you inside. Guitar lesson weather. Comes along every Wednesday. Like a clock.
Later. Moan. We'll leave it at that. I'm repeating the lesson (as well I should), go over the same material for next week. Progress, but no cigar. No cigarillo. No cigarette.
Later still. It's warm, definitely t-shirt weather, broad brimmed hat weather, confirmed walking down to the usual café for lunch. A slow walk, our head was not in the best of shape, then again not in the worst of shape, another day on the furrowed farms of Oakland where the marijuana grows. Which isn't far from the truth.
But again, the late morning walk, a picture or two because I had a camera in hand. Sat briefly watching the geese walk by my bench, the lake in the background, a young woman walking along the lake slowly with a camera around her neck, shooting pictures. Much too young to be too curious about other her pictures and photographers, I've noted, rarely acknowledge one another's presence. Maybe something to do with the characteristics that bring them to the craft. Either that or a statement on my own inhibited ideas on how it works.
So we'll go over our guitar lesson again this afternoon, think about slipping in a nap somewhere in there and see how the day continues to unfold.
Evening. I did lie down for a while, fine, feel better for that. Retuned the guitar and practiced for about an hour going over those riffs. Slowly, slowly they move forward.
Drove to the supermarket for cheese and crackers. Avoid sharp cheddar was the advice and I do, I do, but not today. Today I don't. Things have pulled themselves together this late afternoon and early evening, as they usually do, the world much clearer; the afternoons and evenings better than the mornings. Same question - why? - same answer: I have no idea.