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She likes my journal !!

They have better beds on the A ward.


San Francisco Gay Pride Parade

July 11th, 2000

eCaligula And I
So, today, MSW and I took our mutual friend, my manager, to lunch. Actually, MSW paid, so I guess she took the three of us to what will probably be our last lunch together, certainly our last lunch together as fellow employees, as he is leaving the company for what will undoubtedly be big bucks and better times. The swine. Leaving us here in Oakland. You make friends. Time passes. You invent traditions. Lunching together every summer during the Coho salmon season, a special restaurant every now and then in San Francisco or Berkeley. Not often, so you look forward to them as they occur. And then friends pass as they must and the hallways fill with strangers who wouldn't know a Coho salmon from a Samoan duck.

Still, these departures do happen, and they're often a catalyst to get off your butt and to reinvent your life after a suitable period in bed with the covers pulled up. They tell you this is ultimately good for the mind and the heart and the economy. The Phoenix and the ashes and that. "Tsk, tsk", a pat on the head, "onward". Onward. They will replace him with an eCaligula, of course, or, if the stars are bad and the great roulette wheel stops on my number, eCaligula Rex. Been there. Might be there again. Tomorrow.

It's probably not good that the only consistent energy I've had over these last few years is for the San Francisco Gay Pride Parade photography and the journal. And even they've had their ups and downs. What does that say for the future? My future. The rent? The ridiculously extravagant life style? The almost fast cars? Well, car. How are these maintained on a journal appetite under the lash of an eCaligula (Rex) manager? Well, unfortunatly, by action on my part. By reinventing the kid one more time. (Is this a recurring theme or what?). One must start cautiously, of course. Reinvention is not tax deductible. Write up the SQLNet documents next week and post them on the web to see if the process kills me. I've been putting this off now forever, so it must be serious, this putting it off and off and off. Life threatening. So if it doesn't kill me, then I'll have to sit down and decide if I want to do it again, because if I continue with my present job I will be faced with a never ending stream of agains.

But this entry started with MSW and the farewell lunch for our friend, my manager. I am feeling blue. And MSW is making me nervous. My manager has been known over these years for his bald statements that in a true and just universe he would be presented with "the package" (a pink slip and a year's salary). I decided finally this was an ongoing joke, nothing to worry about, and that he would one day die on the phone in his office at the age of 99 long after my own demise. "The package". An ongoing joke. I am familiar with ongoing jokes. So his resignation last week came as a surprise. MSW is also known for her "package" statements. What does his leaving mean for her future? Who is then left? Me and eCaligula?

The photographs were taken at the San Francisco Gay Pride Parade. The quote under The Sole Proprietor title is by Robert Orben. No, I don't know who he is either.