I Stumbled On
Friday. Another day, the blood pressure holding its ground at 95/65. Generally, from past experience, blood pressures any lower than these create symptoms similar to those I'm having now, occasional dizziness while walking, lack of energy, a fuzzy-headed window on the world. How much of what I'm feeling now is due to the low blood pressure and how much is due to recovering from an operation? The cardiologist says don't make any changes, we'll make adjustments later if necessary after all the internal cutting and pasting has healed. OK. I guess.
So I'm still in hazy day time, take it as it comes, try a picture or two (why is it so hard to set up a tripod and take a couple of pictures?), force myself to eat something twice a day (yes, it's nice to be losing weight, but I've heard not eating doesn't do you well) and just, I don't know, keep on truckin’. It's getting easier to swallow (I've been wrestling with all of these extraneous symptoms probably not associated with this surgery rather than concentrating on the purpose and progress of the surgery itself: “has it worked?”, “is it going as it should?”, “will it turn out well?”) and I'm assuming easier to swallow is a positive. I'm meeting with the surgeon again Monday. Maybe write down a couple of my questions before I arrive.
So, again, here in the apartment, will I get a walk in later since I didn't get out yesterday and hunkered down here and slept instead? Am I up for, say, a bus downtown and a walk around City Center? Simple, not too stressful stuff? I did a couple of bus ride walks earlier this week, the first reasonably ambitious and somewhat stressful, the second much less ambitious and in many ways more stressful. Some things appear to be getting better, some things appear to be getting worse. The idea of a short walk is a big time ambition at the moment, forget any thoughts of travel. My cousin's son Scott is performing with his comedy group again in L. A. next week. Will I be in any condition to drive a car down to L. A. and see him perform? Not the way I feel right now.
Saturday. So much for ease in swallowing. I tried eating a beef patty on toast this afternoon and my esophagus and stomach were not amused. Back to Yogurt and the occasional waffle with a bit of syrup. I can eat eggs in the sense that any of us can eat eggs anymore. The occasional tuna fish sandwich works if it's handled with care. Ice cream and chocolate bars are bearable.
I'm not sure how to compare today with days earlier this week. I walked down past the farmer's market in the middle of the afternoon to test that hamburger patty (on dry toast with catsup). Not a long walk, a little over a half mile in each direction. I took it slowly and still needed to stop mid journey to sit and catch my breath. Not much to say for me after seeing that. Maybe the best way to summarize the day is to say: “I stumbled on.”